Welcome to The Fifth Edition of The Naked Roommate Newsletter, HOMESICK: And Damn Proud of IT. To kick off the sickness, I’d like to invite everyone who is HOMESICK AND DAMN PROUD OF IT to join my Facebook Group. Those of you who have been refused access to Facebook because you don’t have an “.edu” in your email address, you are no longer alienated and excluded. Facebook is now available to anyone with a heartbeat and an email address. Just sign up.

On the topic of groups, THANK YOU to everyone who has helped The Naked Roommate Facebook Group reach the 500 member mark. While that’s a lot of people (especially if you’re in an elevator), 50,000 members is even more impressive. If you’re cool with this idea, please invite 10 friends to join and force them to invite 10 friends (but don’t force them using physical force). If you’re not on Facebook and don’t want to sign up for the group, you can always spread the word via MySpace or spread nothing.

With that, I welcome you to the HOMESICK issue. We all feel it. It can’t be avoided. Whether living on campus, or in an apartment, or even at home, the sickness reaches all corners of the campus culture. In this issue we don’t focus only on the cure for homesickness, we revel in the joy of the condition that ties and binds all students together. If you JUST can’t enjoy this issue, take advantage of National Depression Screening Day (October 5) and see if this is something more than just a longing for the familiar. Enjoy the sickness.

NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE: PASSING CLASS. How do you get an A? How do you get a C? How do you fail? Yes, I want failing tips. Send your stories. Only your college and year in school will be included. Sending stories means you grant permission to use content in The Naked Roommate Newsletter, online, in books, and anywhere else Harlan's writing appears.

THE STORY: I never felt more homesick than the moment my mom and my best friend left after move in day. I had already been upset that my boyfriend of a year and a half hadn't been able to come. The moment I watched my mom's car drive away, I just started bawling. I cried for hours after that. At points in time I thought that I was okay, and then my mom or my boyfriend would call and I would go bonkers. After that my mom had told about everyone on the planet and everyone from home; my friends and family would call me knowing I was having a hard time adjusting and ask me if I was alright. It helped because they all knew I was having a hard time and I wanted to push myself and show them that I can overcome this. And eventually I did.

THE STORY: I was completely fine the first two weeks at college. Then I started getting angry at things that wouldn't go right. Little nit-picky things, such as someone being in the bathroom the exact moment I realized I had to go pee. I would just get so angry and never knew why, and I hate myself when I'm angry. So one night I was talking to my mom, because we have that amazing "I'll tell you everything" relationship, and I told her how angry I've been. She just came out and said, "You're angry because you don't get to be home." Then she reminded me that when we go on long vacations (lasting about nine days or more) I usually get really homesick and I use all this energy in negative ways. She wasn't even surprised I felt like this at all! Now I'm just homesick all the time, and it sucks. Although I have been teaching myself to be less angry about it, it's been additionally hard because one of my roommates only lives an hour away and her parents have been here almost every other weekend. They come in and give her a big kiss and a hug. Then they give me a big kiss (on the cheek) and a hug and ask me if I want them to bring me anything. First of all, I'm perfectly capable of getting what I need. Second, if I'm not, then I would want my OWN parents to go out and get it for me, not someone's mom who feels bad for me because my parents are six hours away.

I especially miss the people that know me, that know who I am. It's been tough meeting people and staying true to myself. I am starting over with a whole new fresh batch of people that have no idea that I wrestle with my older brother and win all the time (...well, I guess you know now). My method of dealing with homesickness is telling myself everyday that I WILL get to see my parents again and I WILL sleep in my own bed some day. Just so happens those days will be Thanksgiving break and my birthday (Do you even know how exciting it is to spend your birthday with your own people??! I do!!).

HOMESICKNESS: EVERYONE'S CATCHING IT

THE PROBLEM is that the college brochures don't tell students that most of them will feel homesick at some point. So, if you have or are currently experiencing homesickness, it just means that you are normal (homesickness is different than morning sickness, which would mean that you are pregnant). Whether you live on campus, in an apartment, or at home, you can also experience the sickness. See, homesickness isn't as much about missing home as it is a longing for that familiar feeling that was life before high school graduation. "Home" is as much a feeling as it is a place. Once college gets rolling along, that longing to go back "home" can hit you when you least expect it. Where, when, and how it will hit are all variables that can't be predicted. For example:

• It can hit you in class when you get back your first exam and realize that you're averaging a D+.
• It can hit you while attempting to fall asleep with the soft sounds (or loud thumping) of your roommate making love on top of you (in the bed on top) or to the side of you (in bed or on the floor).
• It can hit you when stepping into the shower while NOT wearing flip flops and feeling (fill in the blank) under your toes.
• It can hit you on the day you wear all white, forget an umbrella, get caught in a downpour, and have to go to class because you have an exam that allows no make-ups (true story).
• It can hit you when biting into the fish on a bun served in the cafeteria on Friday and hearing something go crunch in a sandwich that isn't supposed to be crunchy.
• It can hit you when your long distance boyfriend or girlfriend tells you not to worry about asking if your roommate to spend the night out because he or she isn't going to be visiting.
• It can hit you on Saturday night when you're alone in your room and attempt to call your good friends on other campuses for encouragement, but can't find anyone. So you check out their Facebook profiles and read an update, [friend's name] is HAVING THE TIME OF HER LIFE.
• It can hit you when you go back to high school for homecoming and your date tells you, "This isn't your home anymore."
• It can hit you during parents' weekend while eating steak at a nice restaurant, bringing back old memories of what it was like to eat fine food and not have to pay it off for the next 10 years because you didn't have to charge it on your credit card (the one that came with the free white t-shirt you were wearing when you got caught in the rain).
• It can hit you at home over break, while snuggling in your old Strawberry Shortcake bedding and looking up at your dance trophies on the top shelf of your dresser (not my room).
• It can hit you while your drunk roommate vomits into a Ziploc next to you as prepare for an 8 AM exam.
• It can hit you when you step on the scale and realize your freshman 15 has become the freshman 50.
• It can hit you when you get that credit card bill for $10,000 while wearing the "free t-shirt" you got for signing up.
• It can hit you in calculus class while you're attempting to decipher the language your TA is speaking, still trying to pull that D+ average.
• It can hit you when the below zero wind chill and sharp snow smacks you in the face while waiting for the bus at 7:30 am.
• It can hit you while waiting in the ER on Saturday morning at 3 am, while holding your best friend's hair back so it doesn't get hit with projectile vomit (vomit that is the result of the fish on a bun from Friday that went crunch, but wasn't supposed to be crunchy).

Dear Harlan,

I am in college, and I am 18 years old. I finished my first semester, and I have been here for five months. I am so depressed lately. I hate the dorms. I have to share with 40 other girls on my floor, and there are only two bathrooms. When I try to sleep, I can't, because someone is always making noise. I want to move out, but I don't have the money. I have a few friends, but I am afraid they wouldn't like me if they really knew me. I need help, as there is no way I can afford a psychologist, and my friends are too busy to listen. I want to move. What should I do?

Dear In College,

Twenty of those other girls on your floor are probably just as depressed, but no one talks about it. You gotta get help. Call up your health center and ask what help is available. One of the perks of college is FREE counseling and therapy, or close to free. Make an appointment immediately. Then do yourself a huge favor and tell your parents. Too many college students keep depression a big secret. They walk around pretending to be happy, when, in reality, they're miserable. That only leaves you feeling worse, because no one understands. And being misunderstood is even more depressing. Got it? Get help. One last thing: This is totally normal.