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YOUR FALL 2007 DATES TODAY. LAST YEAR'S DATES INCLUDED: |
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- Ball State U.
- TCU
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- Miami of Ohio
-Kutztown U
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- New Trier HS Parents' Event
- Johnson & Wales
- UT-Arlington
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WANT
TO BRING HARLAN TO CAMPUS? CLICK HERE
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| What
RAs are REALLY Supposed to Do: |
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Assist and encourage floor members to develop a livable,
inclusive, and responsible community through discussions
of floor living guidelines, integration of new students,
study breaks, quiet hours, floor activities, etc.
- Conduct community meetings covering topics such as
community living standards, hall government and involvement
opportunities, judicial policies, semester activity plans,
etc. RAs should regularly throughout the semester.
- Implement community development activities.
- Serve as a positive role model.
- Respond to negative behavior in the community by enforcing
all university and housing policies that govern student
conduct and, when necessary, document Code of Student
Conduct violations.
- Develop an inclusive community. This necessitates an
awareness of human oppression issues and an ability to
respond to bias-related incidents.
- Communicate information about the University, hall
events, regulations to floor members through one-on-one
interactions, posted messages, floor meetings, etc.
- Refer residents as appropriate to respective campus
and community agencies.
- Respond appropriately to crisis situations, but in
no instance respond in a manner which would escalate a
situation that could endanger the RA or resident. Follow
crisis protocol guidelines.
- Perform a series of administrative functions.
- Attend meetings, training sessions, and open and close
halls during break.
- Sleep in their own room each night and be in their
hall at a predetermined time.
- Obey all State Laws regarding alcohol and controlled
substances.
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HOTLINES
(in US)
Free. Confidential. 24/7 |
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Hopeline
Suicide Hotline
800.SUICIDE
CDC
National STD & AIDS Hotline
800.227.8922
National
Domestic Violence Hotline
800.799.SAFE
National
Sexual Assault Hotline
1.800.656.HOPE
National
Youth Crisis Line
800.999.9999
SEE
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES
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RAs,
CAs, and PPs |
March
13, 2007 |
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Welcome to Issue #23 of The Naked Roommate Newsletter: RAs,
CAs, and PPs. They hear it all. They see it all. They
smell it all. They’ll tell you things no one wants to hear.
They’ll tell other people things that you don’t want them
to hear. They sleep on the job and wake up on the job. They’re
flight attendants, cruise directors, friends, family, mentors,
mediators, and even lovers (not recommended). Some people
call them
RAs, others call CAs, some call them PPs. This blog is
a celebration of them all (and honestly, I’ve never heard
them called PPs). Be sure to check out the TOTW
this week. I’ve posted all the responses that couldn’t be
included in the newsletter. They’re worth checking out. As
always, I encourage you to please forward
The Naked Newsletter to friends and family. Also, please come
and join The
Naked Roommate Facebook Group. Thank you!
NEXT
WEEK’s TOPIC: PICKING THE PERFECT COLLEGE - How did you
know IT was RIGHT? What made you pick the school you picked?
If you had to do it over again, what would you do differently?
Share
ALL the details! Sending stories means that you grant
Harlan permission to use your stories in The Naked Roommate
Newsletter, online, in books, and anywhere else Harlan's
writing appears.
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RAs,
CAs, and PPs
THE STORY:
I became an RA after seeing my RA helping people out and
getting to know everyone. I thought it would be a fun thing
to do. Free room and board definitely helped, and then there's
also the added bonus of being "in the know." I can't help
it, I like knowing secrets about people. Getting to know
my residents, and seeing them (25 18 year-old freshmen)
grow up and change from high school students to college
students has been the best part. The worst part has been
confronting my friends about anything—usually it's noise,
but it gets old after awhile to keep saying "Guys, it's
quiet hours." And then we all get yelled at by another RA
for noise. Also, residents hate me just because I'm an authority
figure and for no other reason. That really sucks, especially
when I'm trying to become at least friendly acquaintances
with everyone on the wing. The most surprising part has
been living "in the fishbowl." I remember as a resident
knowing who all the RAs in the building were, and a few
from other buildings too, if they were friends and came
over. I never realized that chances are, they didn't know
who I was. The other day, I had a girl pass me in the hall
when I was going to class and said "Hi Christi, how are
you doing today?" Autopilot kicked in and gave a typical
reply, but my mind was freaking out, because I was pretty
certain I had never seen this girl before in my life and
here she was calling me by my first name. If I had a nametag,
it would be understandable, but it was January and I was
so bundled up that half of my friends probably couldn't
tell who I was until they were right on top of me. Freaky.
- Junior, UW-Platteville
THE STORY:
I became an RA because I was so surprised at my RAs behavior.
I wanted to do everything the opposite as she did it. I
wanted incoming freshmen to have someone there that they
could talk to if they wanted or needed to. The things I
like most about my job are the relationships I get to build
with my residents. The thing I dislike the most about my
job is the paperwork. Writing someone up for the smallest
infraction can take an hour.
- Sophomore, Central Michigan University
THE STORY:
I am currently a C.A. at Northern Illinois University. There
were two reasons for me becoming a C.A.. The first is for
my resume. The second reason is for the benefit of free
housing — let's face it, that’s why a lot of people do it.
The best parts of the job, aside from free room and board,
are the great people you work with and the bonds that form
on your staff. It is a great support network if you are
ever in need because we have to sometimes deal with some
very tough situations. The worst part of the job for me
personally is the level of maturity that many of the residents
lack sometimes, specifically when they are drunk. I live
in a freshman residence hall, and am often shocked at the
lack of respect that people have for each other and the
hall. The most surprising part is the way people think that
they can hide alcohol when you come across a party. When
you knock on a door because you can obviously hear beer
cans being opened up and people yelling “Pour me another
one!” it is kind of hard to argue your way out of that,
but people sure do try. And after they hear the knock everyone
is quieting each other down and hiding the alcohol for 2
minutes before they open the door and act like nothing is
wrong. It really is quite funny sometimes, but also frustrating.
- Sophomore, Northern Illinois University
THE STORY:
I became an RA because I wanted to be someone that people
could come to with their problems. I wanted to be a person
that other students saw as a friend and helper. The best
part about my job is that I have been able to form friendships
with all of my residents. I was expecting this to happen,
but not to the extent it has. I have become friends with
all of them and it is what makes my job worthwhile.
-Sophomore, Central Michigan University
THE STORY:
When I was an RA, we had four women on our floor who had
crabs. They were roommates. Well, I had to call a floor
meeting the first week or so of school to tell the floor
we had some cases of crabs so the women could be careful
and would be informed. While they are considered to be transmitted
sexually, I guess they could spread in close contacts in
the halls. Anyways, cramming 50 women into a small study
lounge to share we had a floor issue was a delicate situation.
Our floor then became known as Crab 1 instead of what it
was called. It was funny later in the year, but at the time
was a little stressful, especially if it was your first
week of classes and you have to share a few bottles of RID
shampoo with 50 women you don't know!
- IU Grad
THE STORY:
I have had an RA who wasn't a very good one. Our floor never
did anything at all and I think I only saw her four times
in the entire semester. She didn't try to reach out at all.
I really didn't consider her my RA. I did have one though.
Upon visiting the basement of one of the other dorms, because
the TV down there was the only one that got Project Runway
on campus, one of the RA's of that hall happened to start
talking to me and he actually watched Project Runway with
me. THAT'S AMAZING! Even though I don't even go to that
school anymore, he has become one of my best friends.
- Freshman, Manchester College
SHARE
YOUR RA STORIES... CLICK HERE |
|
THE
NAKED BLOG
Exposing
It All, Hiding Nothing
BY HARLAN COHEN, AUTHOR OF THE NAKED ROOMMATE
RAs,
CAs, and PPs
As
the semester winds down, it’s time to pay tribute to RAs
(resident assistants or whatever the hell you call them
on your campus). Raise your souvenir shot glass (filled
with milk) and toast the student workers who live with you,
study with you, paint crap with you, try not to bust you,
eat with you, bathe with you, and sleep with you. NOTE:
Your RA shouldn’t be bathing and sleeping with you. Being
an RA is often a thankless job. I’ve gotten to know a lot
of RAs over the years and it amazes me that so much of what
they do goes unnoticed. I wanted to take a moment to thank
them. And please, feel free to add what you're thankful
for to the list in The
Naked Blog:
-
Thank you for not looking inside the room when the door is
open
- Thank you for looking past the four legged showers (and
the six legged, and eight legged)
- Thank you for ONLY dating one resident at a time (you
know who you are)
- Thank you for not sticking your nose in odd smelling
places
- Thank you for not buying residents alcohol and then busting
them for having alcohol
- Thank you for providing air freshener and freshening
up unfresh rooms (and roommates)
- Thank you for working so hard to plan floor events that
only three people attend (two are fellow RAs)
- Thank you for not allowing people to leave hair trimmings
in the sink (especially the curly ones)
- Thank you for creating makeshift barriers around urine,
poop, and other piles/puddles in common areas
- Thank you for telling people to shut the hell up during
quiet hours
- Thank you for tossing out extra roommates that don’t
belong in the room
- Thank you for allowing people to hate you for no reason
- Thank you for all the amazing writing you do when writing
people up
- Thank you for caring enough to remember the names of
the residents on your floor
- Thank you for notifying the entire floor when a floormate
has pubic lice
- Thank you for forbidding masturbating while a roommate
is in the same room (unless the two roommates agree otherwise)
- Thank you for stopping roommates from having loud sex
(or quiet sex) while another roommate is in the room listening
(and not participating).
- Thank you for requesting that all naked roommates put
a towel down before sitting on common chairs, bedding, and
upholstery
- Thank you for covering your residents with blankets when
they’re sleeping in the hall
- Thank you for always posting bail
- Thank you for feeding the hungry (in your hall)
- Thank you for calling the paramedics
- Thank you for inspiring others to become great RAs, even
if that means being the worst RA that has ever walked the
halls (you know who you are)
- Thank you for making sure drunken residents eventually
wake up
- Thank you for helping students get help and when they
need it
- Thank you for not allowing parents to spy on residents
living on your floor
- Thanks for making friends with residents who have been
abandoned by their own RAs
- Thank you for changing lives and forcing people to change
their sheets
- Thank you for keeping your door open and your mind open
- Thank you for inspiring others
- Thank you for caring, being there, and making a difference
in countless lives
WANT
TO GIVE THANKS? CLICK HERE...
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ADVICE
FROM A MAN...
Months
Later, College Roommate Is Still a Stranger
Dear
Harlan,
I've been at college for three weeks, and I love it - except
for my roommate. She spends every possible moment out of
the room partying with her boyfriend (I don't party much).
When she's around, I'm afraid to turn on music or the TV.
I don't know what bothers her. She doesn't care what bothers
me. She'll come in when I'm asleep and be so loud (even
making calls). Today, I had an early class, and her alarm
went off half an hour before I had to get up - and she kept
hitting snooze for an hour. I don't want to move because
I'm very close with the girls on this floor (they still
aren't sure who my roommate is). Living with her is very
uncomfortable!
Uncomfy Roomie
Dear Uncomfy Roomie
Let's clear something up: Roommate does NOT equal friend.
The way to let your roommate know what bothers you is NOT
to tell everyone BUT your roommate about the problem.
Next time she's around, introduce yourself (in case she
forgot who you are). Tell her that you need to talk. Start
by saying that you wanted her to know that if you should
ever do something that makes her uncomfortable, you want
to know. Then let her know that you hope she would want
you to do the same. Then explain the issues. She might not
even know that you have a problem. Hope that she wants to
get along and makes an effort. If not, involve your resident
assistant. As for being friends, just get along. Anything
beyond that is a bonus.
Got
Better Advice??? CLICK HERE |
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BIO: Harlan Cohen
Harlan
Cohen was born naked. He grew up clothed in the suburbs
of Chicago. Once in college, he got dumped by his high school
long distance girlfriend, he didn't get into the fraternity
he had been rushing, and he didn't find his place in college.
Years later, he found that he wasn't the only one. And that's
why he writes about college life. Harlan is also a syndicated
advice columnist, singer/songwriter, speaker, the founder
of Rejection Awareness Week and Chairman of The International
Rejection/Risk-Taking Project. Harlan can be found online
at
helpmeharlan.com,
TheNakedRoommate.com, on Facebook,
and at
MySpace.
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