Close
Friend's Drinking May or May Not
Be A Problem
Dear
Harlan,
I am a junior in high school and have a great group of friends.
I just found out that one of my closer friends goes out to
drink every few weeks or so. I don't have a huge issue with
this, because I know she's responsible and handles herself
well, even though I would never do the same thing. However,
it was mentioned offhand. I don't know whether it was meant
that she gets completely wasted or just buzzed. If she is
getting wasted every other weekend, I'd be seriously worried
and definitely would interfere. My dilemma is this: How should
I go about asking or making sure without sounding like her
mother? Should I even ask, since it's not my business?
Friend
Who Parties
Dear Friend,
The moment she brought it up, it became your business. As
long as you don't punish her or threaten to ground her, I
wouldn't worry about acting motherly. Find out what she's
doing, when she's doing it, where she's doing it, with whom
she's doing it and why she's doing it. Do it because you're
curious (I mean, you are). If you're shocked, surprised or
concerned, then act shocked, surprised and concerned. You
don't have to hide your feelings. If you're afraid she's going
to get hurt, protect her. Just don't tiptoe around this. She
said something because she wanted you to know. So, after finding
out details, let her know how you feel. If you think she's
at risk, interfere.
