Dating
Takes Years of Practice
Dear
Harlan,
I am 14 and have a boyfriend, but when I get around him I
freeze up and can't think of anything to talk to him about.
It's like my mind goes blank, and I can't get the words out.
I would do anything to be able to carry on a five-minute conversation
with him, but I can't. Please help!
Blank Around Boyfriend
Dear
Blank,
Here's
one approach to quiet the chorus of thoughts in your head
that's making it impossible to listen: He's a practice boyfriend,
one of dozens to come. Part of "practice" means that you can
make mistakes. Once you give yourself permission to make mistakes,
you don't have to be perfect. It means that even if you can't
find the words, you can listen and trust that he'll carry
the conversation. Once you give yourself permission to not
be perfect, you can quiet the voices in your head and listen
to what he's saying instead of what you're thinking. Once
you really hear the words, you can have a conversation.
