Woman
Who Gets Attention From Man
Assumes He's Gay
Dear
Harlan,
There
is a man to whom I recently became attracted. He's very sweet,
nice and funny, which made me develop a mad crush on him.
He's very flirty, but in a nonsensual way. He did ask me out,
but I canceled on him. I get lots of attention from this guy,
so much that I think he might be gay. Most straight men who
flirt with women will take it to the next level eventually.
Also, this man has never mentioned an ex-girlfriend or wife.
His mannerism seems gay at times, especially the intonation
in his voice. Harlan, this man is so nice, but I don't want
to ask him if he's gay for fear that I'll upset or insult
him. He has other female friends that he calls and goes out
with. I just need to know if I should stop thinking about
him in intimate ways. How do you know when a man you like
is gay?
Confused and Curious
Dear
Confused and Curious,
How
do you know if a girl is gay? That's what I want to know.
For
years, when I was single, I assumed that any woman who wasn't
interested must be gay. You think everyone who is interested
must be gay. So, here's what you do. Ask him out. If you have
a good time, kiss him. If he kisses you back, you'll know
he could be bisexual. If you get closer, you can ask him about
his sexual history, and then he'll tell you. Until then, it's
just a guessing game. But really, I'm thinking you're afraid
that he's straight because you might fall in love - and to
fall in love means risking getting hurt. No one wants to get
hurt.
