Entry
#103
REJECTION DIARY:
Losing
Coach Stinks Like Ashtray
Dear Harlan,
While
coaching softball this year, one of the girls' dads approached
me, claiming to have liked me for over a year. Well, I decided
to meet up with him one night after MY softball game. We went
back to his place and hung out, and one thing led to another.
We've been together for two months now, but we have not been intimate
for about a month. He has given me some excuses, which are: we
moved too fast in the beginning; he wants to slow it down; he
doesn't have a high sex drive; and now the latest, I smoke and
having sex involves kissing and I taste like a 3-year-old ashtray
and the smell comes out of my pores. Please don't harp on me about
smoking; I'm in the process of quitting. I don't know which, if
any, of the reasons are the truth, but I feel so rejected, unattractive
and hurt. I have tried talking to him in a joking way, but I am
afraid of the REAL truth. Do you think these are just excuses
or what?
Played
Coach
Dear
Played Coach,
I've never kissed or been intimate with a 3-year-old ashtray,
but back in June, I did have a battery of allergy tests. I discovered
that I'm allergic to tobacco, which explains why kissing girls
who smoked back in college made me nauseated. I just thought it
was their personalities. So, it can happen.
Putting the ashtray full of excuses aside, there's a bigger issue.
You're letting him make you think that you're not attractive.
A stronger, more confident woman would know that she's attractive
and demand an honest answer, even if it's hard to hear. So, try
to be that woman and have an honest conversation with him. If
he insists that it's your smoking, quit and see how he responds.
If you sense he's playing games, then quit seeing him. Assume
that he got what he wanted, that he's dating someone else or that
he's gay and you're the wrong gender. DO
NOT assume it's you.
