Entry
#91
REJECTION DIARY:
Take The Risk, Just Not Now!
Dear Harlan,
I'm a college student with a female friend for whom I'm beginning
to develop feelings. All is well, right? Not quite! She has confided
in me by sharing extremely personal stories that involve prior
relationships that went sour and still continue to haunt her.
I helped her as best I could and continue to gently urge her to
go to see a counselor, should she need more help. She's wonderful
and charming, and says that she isn't looking for anyone, but
I can't help but feel that we're getting closer as friends. I
feel like a total scumbag for trying to pick up on her when she's
like this! Am I being wishy-washy, or should I just take THE RISK?
Conflicted
by the Bay
Dear
Conflicted by the Bay,
You're only a scumbag if you're manipulating her relationships.
For example, secretly calling her current love interest and telling
him, "Stop dating my wife!" is a scumbag move. There's nothing
scummy about telling her that you've developed feelings for her.
The only problem is the timing. She's not at her best, and that's
not the best time to express your interest. Even if she reciprocates
the feelings, you risk being in a fast rebound relationship. When
it ends (most do), the friendship will probably end, too. Take
THE RISK, but wait until she's in a better place.
